Monday

My life sucks!

Okay, not really. I am not sick, I am not losing my home, I have food to eat and gas in the car and enough toilet paper. But, today I felt overwhelmed, helpless and friendless. And I cried. Because it sucks that I don't have a job and that there are no jobs to be had where I can earn more than unemployment pays. It sucks that a big branch of a tree fell down in my yard, and I need to get it cut up before it falls all the way and kills a dog or something. Yes, the tree was dead. I KNEW the tree was dead. I should have had it taken care of when I had a job and money. I didn't because there's no easy way to isolate the dogs from this area. So, I ignored it and now it has fallen and I need to do something and I have no one to help me, and it sucks. I could pay someone money (that I don't really have) to come cut it up, but I still have the problem of no way to keep the dogs away. Putting them in the house won't work-the tree is right outside the glass patio door, and the dogs wouldn't like seeing strangers in the yard. And the previous owners put stupid folding doors on all the bedrooms that the dogs can open so I can't put them in a room. And, the door to the garage won't close all the way so the dogs can open it and get back inside. I could be outside with them, but I'm afraid they would get hurt by chainsaws or falling branches. I could go rent a chain saw and cut it up myself. And hope that I don't cut my leg off.

It sucks. It all sucks.

And, a well-meaning person from the rescue emailed me today to ask if I was going to put ads for our garage sale in the paper. And, why didn't I want to pick up large furniture. No way am I going to pay for newspaper ads! And, how the hell am I going to transport large furniture in my car? By myself! Oh yeah, I can lift a sofa and stuff it in the back of a Chevy HHR, no problem. Yes, I volunteered to do this garage sale-BACK WHEN I STILL HAD A JOB! Now all I have to give is time. You can have all of it, but don't ask me to spend money, because I can't and it makes me cry.

And then I stepped in dog shit.

See? My life sucks.