I'm not fond of the ritual of Christmas presents. For so many years I would really try to buy people things that they actually wanted and would use, but rarely got it right. Nine times out of ten the presents I got in return were things that were completely useless to me. I know, we're supposed to be grateful for the thought, not the things, but I don't go out and spend money on things that I'll never use (well, not intentionally, but there are time that I make a mistake), so it just bothers me that I feel that I MUST spend money on other people and I get useless crap in return. With some people that I deal with at holiday time gift giving is NOT an option-it is required. The consequence of not giving gifts is not pretty.
It may seem shallow, but I now make a wish list at Amazon. And, I request that people I need to buy gifts for do the same. Yes, it would be nice to use what I know about someone and pick something out and have it be appreciated, but that just doesn't happen in my family. The Mother has voiced her displeasure with almost everything I've ever bought her that wasn't something she specifically requested.
My brother and I have reached an understanding. We have opted out of the Christmas-Gift-Must-Participate madness. We're both much happier about it. But, that brings me to the saga of the Christmas Boots.
Two years ago The Sister requested “fake Ugg boots”. Now, I didn't interpret this as meaning “boots that look just like the original Uggs, but don't cost over $100”. I thought she just wanted some warm, shearling boots. I had just bought a really cute pair of boots that didn't look anything like Uggs, but were made with sheepskin and had a nice sole, and I thought she might like them too. I sent her the link so she could look at them. She said they were fine. But by the time she responded and I went to buy them, they were sold out. So, I searched for a couple of hours and found a similar pair. Sent her THAT link. Same thing. She said they were fine, but it had taken her so long to respond that THOSE were sold out. At least, they were sold out at the Target on line store. I ran over to the Target near work on my lunch hour, and went through every pair of boots on the shelf. I found the last pair they had in her requested size. Bought them, and did an on line postage thing with USPS to send them Priority Mail. Apparently, paying for PM doesn't guarantee that anything will actually be SENT that way. The package took over two weeks to get there, and TS's feelings were hurt because she didn't have a present to open on Christmas. Then when the boots finally arrived they were too small. Obviously, Christmas #1 didn't turn out too well.
So, on to Christmas #2. That year TS was going to be at TM's house. She hadn't put anything on her wish list, too busy, limited internet access, etc. Now TM stepped into the fray over the boots, and berated me because I hadn't listened to TS about what she wanted. “She wanted slippers.” Slippers? She said boots, but whatever. Remembering how important it was for TS to have something to open on Christmas I again searched for hours and found some nice and affordable shearling slippers. Told TM that I would be having the package shipped to her house so that TS would have a gift there. TM received the package, opened it and put the slippers in her closet because she completely forgot that I told her the slippers were for TS, and they didn't fit her. When the mix up was discovered the slippers were wrapped to be opened on Christmas, but they “didn't fit right”, and weren't what she wanted. She wanted BOOTS that looked like the good old original Uggs. Dear Mother; Ugg boots are NOT slippers.
By this time it was too late to even buy the nice fake Uggs that they sell at CostCo. So, I told TS to find what she wanted on line, send me the link and I would buy them and would keep the slippers myself. I really like those slippers. Anyway, also by this time TS was headed out of the country to go work on a yacht or something, so I told her that I would have the boots shipped to me and would leave them at our brother's house, because she always goes there when she comes to town even when she's short on time. I thought that the matter of The Boots was closed. I was wrong. In October I got an email from TS asking if I was going to do anything about replacing the slippers. Both siblings had forgotten that a new pair of boots was in the closet in the spare room. He finally found them, but by then TS was back in the Caribbean for work. She breezed through town last week, and I assumed that she had picked up the boots and finally all would be right with the world. Wrong again. The boots (in the size she requested) were once again TOO SMALL. You know, I used to always wear a size 7 shoe, but now I wear an 8. Feet sometimes get bigger, it happens. Of course, by the time I found this out TS was back in the frozen place she chooses to live, and her feet were cold. It just so happened that earlier that day I had bought a pair of baby blue fake Uggs for $10 at the store where CostCo sells off things cheap. Things that have no boxes, left over one-offs, etc. They were a size bigger than TS has been requesting, because that's the only size they had. Will baby blue be okay? Yes? So, I paid for priority mail, AGAIN, and sent off my new baby blue boots.
I have now spent so much money buying her boots that I should have just bought real Uggs in the first place. If these don't work, I don't want to hear about it. “La la la la la, I can't hear you.”
ELEANOR ANTIN
100 Boots Facing the Sea 1971-73 Silver gelatin print8 x 10 inches
Courtesy of Ronald Feldman Fine Arts, New York
Del Mar, California February 9, 1971 2:00 p.m. (mailed: March 15, 1971)
I took an art class from Eleanor. She is a very interesting woman, and I mean that in a good way. I actually received this postcard in the mail from her. I wish I hadn't lost it. The price of being young and stupid. If you want to see more of the adventures of the 100 boots: PBS Series
NO BLOG ENTRY WOULD BE COMPLETE....
...without a word from the morons.
I've commented before that the "blogs of note" as designated by Blogger.com often aren't really noteworthy. Here's a few bits from a noted blog:
“First Sony in all their wisdom decided that the PS3 was too good and down graded there console and in doing that took away the ability to emulate PS2 games, they have also dropped 2 USB ports, the multi car reader and the HD is 20GB smaller.”
And: “This quote baffles me a bit as sure you can upgrade the USB and card reader with extra hardware, and you can also upgrade the HD, but I am sure that opening the device would void the warranty Mr Ephraim and if dust is a warranty voider then I would hate to see what using none Sony peripherals does to your warranty. It is looking that the only people who will be able to use there warranty is people who never take there PS3 out of the box.”
Obviously, good grammar is not one of the things they take into consideration when they choose blogs to spotlight.
From frequent contributor Channel 10:
Even the not-a-moron weather person isn't immune: Talking about what could happen if your neighbor doesn't trim a tree and it falls on your stuff: “That person could be negligible.” I sometimes feel negligible myself.
From a “digital reporter” (What are those? Apparently, morons with digital cameras.) Talking about a recreational basketball team, except he pronounced it “re-creational.” Do you have any clue what you're reading?
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